ADDRESSING WHITEWASHING IN THERAPY

Back when I was in my 20’s my family decided to engage in family therapy. This was my first time experiencing whitewashing in the mental health field. Somehow it came up that I would be the one to wake up my younger sister to get ready for school in the morning. Our therapist made a very confused face and before asking why I did this (both of our parents left to go to work before the youngest were awake), she immediately told me that I was not her parent and should not be in charge of waking her up in the morning. She also told me I should not check my siblings’ online portal for late or missing homework assignments and again, didn’t ask why this was happening.  I didn’t question her as she was the authority figure and I made the changes she asked for. However, looking back on that experience I now see how a perfectly normal sibling dynamic in a Mexican home was deemed not normal or healthy and viewed as the problem. Now as a therapist, I have seen and heard whitewashing from other therapists that I’ve worked with and see that whitewashing goes beyond basic statistics of racial identity of therapists.

In the mental health field, I see whitewashing in a few different ways. It is no secret that the majority of therapists are white (about 83%) followed by Hispanics which make up 7%, Asians represent 4% and African American make up 3% according to 2019 data from the American Psychological Association. Furthermore, the mental health field’s lack of diversity dates back to its beginning where the earliest leaders in psychology were white males. When we look at studies done to inform treatment and education around mental health, most participants are also white which leads evidence-based treatment to cater towards the Caucasian culture.  As a client, there isn’t a lot you can do yourself to address this type of whitewashing in the field. But there is another form of whitewashing that happens when you do engage in therapy that you can address.

 “I’m working with a Mexican family so you know, no boundaries, right?”

“She calls her “Nana” and talks to her about everything. They clearly have an enmeshed relationship.”

“Their kids are adults and still living at home, they need to make them leave so the kids can be independent.” (Funny- remember how I was in my 20’s doing family therapy?)

“My 16 year old is responsible for making dinner. She is being parentified.”

“She has both her parents and her mother-in-law living with them. She needs to send them to a nursing home.”

These are some of the comments I’ve heard come from white therapists when talking about specifically Hispanic clients. It shows a lack of understanding of other cultures and assuming that the Caucasian culture is the standard for healthy relationships and overall mental health. It can be very invalidating to be on the receiving end of this assumption and for me, incredibly angering.

So what do you do if you are a non-white client whose therapist has just whitewashed treatment for you?

1)     Question your therapist

 Remember, YOU are the client paying for a service. It is appropriate to ask your therapist for evidence or studies that back up the changes they are asking you to make. Giving up cultural norms or traditions just because others see them as bizarre is not a valid reason to change. (I asked my husband to show me medical proof that piercing our daughter’s ears as a baby was bad for her- he couldn’t. So her ears were pierced as is the norm in the Hispanic culture.) You can suggest for further exploration of the problem instead of jumping to what may seem as the most obvious to someone else. Me waking up my sister before school and checking her grades hadn’t been the problem at all. The problem had been how anger was expressed during a fight. You can also inform your therapist that the change they want you to make isn’t a goal you are wanting to work towards.

2)     Educate them about your culture’s norms

I don’t like putting clients in the role of educator during sessions but sometimes it is important to gain a better understanding of something that is going on. You can take some time to talk to your therapist about how a particular situation is normal and how it might even be beneficial for you. It’s ok to also direct them to some resources to further educate them on cultural norms outside of session time that isn’t on your dime.

3)     Speak about your journey in assimilation and acculturation

Acculturation involves adopting some aspects of a new culture while assimilation is fully adopting the new culture while rejecting the original identity or culture. Each family and individual has their own journey and it’s important to know what your journey is at different points in your life. As an adolescent, I tried making myself as white as possible having grown up in predominately white community. As an adult, I am pushing away from assimilation and reconnecting with my roots which would make me more resistant to suggestions in therapy that contradict my culture. This can be a part of your therapy process that informs your treatment.

4)     Be willing stand your ground

It might be scary and even feel unnatural to challenge or refuse to do something that your therapist is asking you to do. If you feel like your therapist isn’t helping you reach your goals and might be imposing their own values and goals on to you, it might be time to search for a new provider. Finding someone that looks like you or comes from the same background may be difficult but you can look for someone that has traveled, lives in a diverse community, or speaks of being open and welcoming to different backgrounds. When I sought out therapy I began my session as a client by telling my therapist about my racial and religious background and asked if she could work within my worldview.

From my experience, therapists that have whitewashed treatment haven’t done it from a place of racism but more so from a place of ignorance and personal comfort. It is not our responsibility to change to make them comfortable or make working with us easier, it is their ethical responsibility to gain skills and knowledge in working with diverse populations.